A biography for John Pinettehasn’t been written yet.
“When I moved from Boston to L.A., I floundered. I definitely did time at the Improv and the Comedy Store, making 20 bucks a night. I learned how to be a starving comic. I was an in-debt comic: I ate well on loan.”
“I never dreamed that I would be part of a Broadway show.”
“I walk into a Home Depot and it's like everything in there needs assembly. I start hyperventilating. I need the inhaler.”
“When I really want to get healthy people don't believe me.”
“All I want to do is entertain. I want to get good laughs and I want to entertain.”
“My family is trying to drag me kicking and screaming into the normal world. Please, I live in hotel rooms.”
“I have no problem joking about who I am.”
“On the set, you do a movie shoot, you go, 'OK, was that OK, how was that?' You dont know, you're not sure.”
“I was an accountant for six months, and for the last three, I didn't do much work.”
“I liked Jonathan Winters for his character development.”
“Hollywood has a lot of barriers set up for everyone. If you can live with it, and you can break through, then you're going to do OK.”
“All I'm really doing is talking about going on diets and... just about being a big guy. Why should that be any different from a comic that says, 'I was an alcoholic,' or, 'I was in a bad relationship?'”
“There's nothing like live performance.”
“I have no butt, none of the men in my family do.”
“At home, I have a healthy regular diet... But on the road, you find yourself at 11 o'clock at night, after a great show at a performing-arts center, and there's nothing open but a pizza place.”
“If I was 120 pounds, I still ain't going white-water rafting.”
“Opening for Mr. Sinatra in 1991 enabled me to do Vegas more as an opening act. I did the Superdome with him, probably nine arenas over a year and a half, and his second-to-last appearance at the Desert Inn in Vegas.”
“It doesn't seem like I write the material it seems like the material comes to me and I write it down.”
“I really am part whale. I want to do a movie like 'The Incredible Mr. Limpet' and join a family of whales.”
“I started swimming. I frolic like Free Willy.”