A biography for Carrot Tophasn’t been written yet.
“My real name is Scott Thompson. I could have gone by that name, but when I started doing comedy I thought I needed to go by something that has a little more of a hook.”
“I've always wanted to do a segment on a talk show. Jay Leno has been such a good friend, and if he would allow me, I'd have to get it all together, but I'd like to go on 'The Tonight Show' and do a set with no props. Or come out with a trunk and never touch it. Or come out with a clear trunk with nothing in it.”
“I never looked at Gallagher like he was a threat to me.”
“I didn't really have a plan of attack when I got in college.”
“Everybody has their own style. If you went to the movies every week and everybody acted the same way Tom Cruise did, boy, wouldn't that suck?”
“Me in drag is kind of scary, actually. It's frightening. I actually look pretty good.”
“When I was younger I always thought, 'If I were ever a comedian I'd make it like a rock concert.' I wanted to generate that type of enthusiasm and excitement.”
“Video games are so popular these days, getting the opportunity to star in one is something special. More people should do it.”
“My manager has a car payment, so I work every night.”
“Almost every day, someone asks if I ever flat iron my hair. I say, 'No, because I'm afraid it wouldn't look good and wouldn't come back curly.'”
“I have to go out for lunch and dinner because I can't cook. I need a woman to come and save me from my cooking.”
“People do give me a hard time about my hair because it's orange and it's big.”
“In movies, you don't get reactions: Live, when you do a joke, you know in a second whether it's good or bad. But in a movie, since no one is allowed to laugh or do anything, when you're done with a scene, you're left asking, 'Was that funny?'”
“Comics don't like to see other comics do well.”
“I think it's important for me, for my crew and for the audience to bring something new to each show. I have friends who have done the same act, word for word for word, for 20 years. I have a problem with that. I think the audience should see something new in each show.”
“I always think everyone else is funnier than me. I look at other comedians and I say, 'I wish I was that good.' People think I'm funny, and I say, 'I'm not.'”
“There's nothing wrong with trying to reach out to new fans.”
“I do go through a mini depression because one minute there are people yelling and screaming for me on stage and the next I'm at home and it's dead quiet. So it takes a while to come down.”
“Before I got addicted to comedy, I was seriously thinking about playing tennis full time. I joined the tennis team and played with a lot of professionals.”
“My way of fitting in was through jokes and making people laugh.”