“The contrasting focus on connection versus hierarchy also sheds light on innumerable adult conversations - and frustrations. Say a woman tells another about a personal problem and hears in response, 'I know how you feel' or 'the same thing happens to me.' The resulting 'troubles talk' reinforces the connection between them.”

American author and linguist

Deborah Tannen is an American author and linguist, associated with Georgetown University in Washington, D.C. She is best known for You Just Don't Understand, and has 105 quotes on the site. She has also served as a McGraw Distinguished Lecturer at Princeton University. Her work and academic roles place her in the study of language and communication, especially the ways people understand one another.