Ron Funches

“When you get to be a certain size as a man, all the shirts end up having giant dogs on them or things like that!”

“Denver has smart and energetic crowds that appreciate good comedy and don't take themselves too seriously.”

“I think I'd probably be really good friends with Hulk Hogan. I think we'd get along, and I'd, like, chill him out because he'd be all rambunctious and rowdy, and I'd be like, 'Chill out, Hulk Hogan. Everything will be okay.' And he'd be like, 'Thanks, Ron.' And then we'd form a friendship.”

“We all have enemies, but my enemies would probably describe me as surprisingly ruthless.”

“I was always interested in comedy, like when I was 5 years old. I watched 'I Love Lucy' and 'Benny Hill.' I would always joke around with my sister. My mom was into comedy, too. She would go to the video store and get a couple of movies and some stand-up comedians' tapes.”

“Being nice can be funny. A lot of my jokes are like, 'Let me take a bad situation and try to put the best spin on it.'”

“Doing five-minute sets on 'Conan' and things like that are fun and a great way to introduce yourself, but it's such a constricting time, and you usually have to cut bits down.”

“'Malcolm X' was impressionable for me as a kid.”