A biography for Nikki Glaserhasn’t been written yet.
“Nothing really shocks me anymore.”
“Just sharing things that are either embarrassing or possibly relatable, searching for that laugh so that someone makes me feel less alone. Like, 'Oh, they laughed, so they get what I'm saying.”
“I always told my parents, 'Just give me till I'm 27 to do comedy, to make it'.”
“I've been saying inappropriate things since I was a kid.”
“I love what I do, but living in one place for an entire year and not being on the road constantly was glorious. The road lifestyle is not ideal for a woman who's about to be thirty.”
“I would much rather be someone with high self-esteem and less funny.”
“All my life - middle school, high school - I've always been worried what are people going to think.”
“A lot of being a woman in this business is about how you look... That's not why we're even in this business; that's not what people want from us. We're valuable because we're funny and because we have a voice and a point of view.”
“Up until recently, I've said, 'I don't notice the sexism in the industry.'”
“The best stuff - the most interesting stuff - usually happens when I allow myself to be in the moment and working from that space.”
“Everything I write in my show is a collaboration with a team.”
“We just learned about this fetish where guys just give women money and know that they are spending their money. It's not like a sugar daddy thing. It's like financial domination, or something like that. These guys just want to give you money.”
“I knew what I wanted to do, so I was constantly working on material once I got to KU.”
“Make eye contact with cute strangers. Give guys your email. Email is safer than a number, or at least it feels that way.”
“I nannied for a couple of months. The kids were super-funny; it made me wish I grew up in a comedy household. But nannying is demoralizing. I'm just not cut out for it.”
“I have to say that it's fun to write for young girls, and it's exciting to know that we're influencing them and they're looking at us like, 'I want to grow up and be like them.' I mean, I just made up the person saying that.”
“I just realized I have probably spent more time in a strip club than Rihanna has, and that is saying a lot because she goes a lot!”
“My logic used to be if I get angry at my boyfriend, he could say, 'Well, if that thing I do that I don't want to stop doing makes you mad, I don't need to be with you. Bye!' And then he'd leave me. Forever.”
“I'm not a bleeding-heart feminist, but I do like to call out that stuff in my act. It's nice when you find a perspective that no one has hit on.”
“That's the compliment I get most often - 'You guys are so honest.'”