A biography for John Bishophasn’t been written yet.
“My generation are the neurotic ones. Therapists' offices all over the world are full of patients blaming their parents for their own failings.”
“Being a family man has been the most rewarding and the most disappointing thing I have done in my life.”
“I've learned more about having more time as I've got older.”
“I go out with my mates and after a drink they'll ask, 'How are you a comedian? You're not the funniest among us,' And they're right - I'm not even the funniest in our house.”
“When I was 30 we had two kids, a third on he way. I was working for a pharmaceutical company. I had been married four years.”
“Comic Relief funds projects that help lift people out of poverty.”
“I have fond memories of the Grand National, but in recent years, as I have become more committed to animal welfare, I have grown increasingly uncomfortable about an event that every year results in the deaths of horses.”
“I just don't think it's acceptable that any animal should lose its life in pursuit of entertainment, which is also why I believe all blood sports should be banned.”
“When have you ever sat down with your mates and said, 'Look, tell me about your dad?'”
“I don't regard myself as big time.”
“It's very gratifying sometimes to make yourself the butt of the joke because it bursts your bubble.”
“I'm the type of bloke who gets a flatpack cabinet from Ikea, puts it together without reading the instructions, then gets the drill out because the holes are in the wrong place.”
“In my comedy when there's a victim, it's me.”
“There was a deficit between what I was earning and what my family needed to live off. I was resigned to the fact that, while I may do the odd night, I was going to have to get a proper job.”
“An accent like mine defines you regionally, but it also gives you a class identity.”
“My job is trying to make people laugh. A room full of people laughing forget their worries, their issues, that's why I find it so joyful.”
“When you're 18, you might think that you're interesting. You're not, you're boring.”
“I still feel I'm living someone else's life.”
“As a child I qualified for free school meals, so I know I would have been in one of the families that needed help to gain access to a laptop.”
“I do get propositions, but you can't take it serious. I'm in me mid-forties, I've got teenage kids - there's no way I'm going to be caught in a Jacuzzi with some girl out of 'The Only Way Is Essex.'”