A biography for Jay Londonhasn’t been written yet.
“I was born nine months premature.”
“They asked me what I thought about euthanasia. I said I'm more concerned about the adults.”
“After all these years I had the privilege of naming my private part, cause we have nicknames. So I named my private part pride... it's not much but at least I have my pride.”
“My whole family is lactose intolerant and when we take pictures we can't say cheese.”
“I once dated a weather girl, we talked up a storm.”
“I wanted to join the Army the sign said 'Be All That You Can Be', they told me it wasn't enough.”
“At Motel 6 in Amish Country I wonder if they leave the light on for you?”
“My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless.”
“It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.”
“A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked.”
“I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.”
“Do you know it was a year a ago today?”
“I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.”
“You know what burns me? Matches.”
“My girlfriend bought me a down jacket, she said it fit my personality.”