James Veitch

“I went to see my mother the other day, and she told me this story that I'd completely forgotten about how, when we were driving together, she would pull the car over, and by the time she had gotten out of the car, and gone around the car to let me out of the car, I would have already gotten out of the car and pretended to have died.”

“People say we live in an age of information overload. Right? I don't know about that, but I just know that I get too many marketing emails.”

“I get a ton of scam emails. But instead of deleting them, I decided to hit reply.”

“You can succeed as a terrible director, but try doing that with stand-up: try being a terrible comedian and getting up on stage. The funny will win out very, very quickly.”