“Often men who have been emotionally neglected and abused as children by dominating mothers bond with assertive women, only to have their childhood feelings of being engulfed surface. While they could not 'smash their mommy' and still receive love, they find that they can engage in intimate violence with partners who respond to their acting out by trying harder to connect with them emotionally, hoping that the love offered in the present will heal the wounds of the past. If only one party in the relationship is working to create love, to create the space of emotional connection, the dominator model remains in place and the relationship just becomes a site for continuous power struggle.”

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About bell hooks

bell hooks is an American cultural critic and feminist theorist. She is best known for her accessible, intersectional writings on race, gender, and education, blending academic rigor with a commitment to social justice. Her work remains influential in discussions about identity and systemic change.

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"Often men who have been emotionally neglected and abused as children…" — bell hooks | Daily Quotes