Stephen Leacock

“He flung himself from the room, flung himself upon his horse and rode madly off in all directions.”

“Golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law, but being a form of moral effort.”

“Writing is no trouble: you just jot down ideas as they occur to you. The jotting is simplicity itself - it is the occurring which is difficult.”

“It takes a good deal of physical courage to ride a horse. This, however, I have. I get it at about forty cents a flask, and take it as required.”

“The Lord said 'let there be wheat' and Saskatchewan was born.”

“The classics are only primitive literature. They belong to the same class as primitive machinery and primitive music and primitive medicine.”

“Each section of the British Isles has its own way of laughing, except Wales, which doesn't.”

“There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike - information and wit.”

“It may be those who do most, dream most.”

“Electricity is of two kinds, positive and negative. The difference is, I presume, that one comes a little more expensive, but is more durable; the other is a cheaper thing, but the moths get into it.”

“Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.”