Shel Silverstein

“Tell me I'm clever, Tell me I'm kind, Tell me I'm talented, Tell me I'm cute, Tell me I'm sensitive, Graceful and wise, Tell me I'm perfect - But tell me the truth.”

“I cannot go to school today"Said little Peggy Ann McKay."I have the measles and the mumps,A gash, a rash and purple bumps.My mouth is wet, my throat is dry.I'm going blind in my right eye.My tonsils are as big as rocks,I've counted sixteen chicken pox.And there's one more - that's seventeen,And don't you think my face looks green?My leg is cut, my eyes are blue,It might be the instamatic flu.I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,I'm sure that my left leg is broke.My hip hurts when I move my chin,My belly button's caving in.My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,My 'pendix pains each time it rains.My toes are cold, my toes are numb,I have a sliver in my thumb.My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,I hardly whisper when I speak.My tongue is filling up my mouth,I think my hair is falling out.My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,My temperature is one-o-eight.My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,There's a hole inside my ear.I have a hangnail, and my heart is ...What? What's that? What's that you say?You say today is .............. Saturday?G'bye, I'm going out to play!”

“If you're behind the times, they won't notice you. If you're right in tune with them, you're no better than they are, so they won't care much for you. Be just a little ahead of them.”

“He has the obligation to society that any human being has. I don't think a satirist has any greater obligation to society than a bricklayer or anybody else.”

“If we meet and I say, "Hi,"That's a salutation.If you ask me how I feel,That's a consideration.If we stop and talk awhile,That's a conversation.If we understand each other,That's communication.If we argue, scream and fight,That's an altercation.If later we apologize,That's a reconciliation.If we help each other home,That's cooperation.And all these ations added upMake civilization.(And if I say this is a wonderful poem, Is that exaggeration?)”

“POOR ANGUSOh what do you do, poor Angus,When hunger makes you cry?"I fix myself an omelet, sir,Of fluffy clouds and sky."Oh what do you wear, poor Angus,When winds blow down the hills?"I sew myself a warm cloak, sir,Of hope and daffodils."Oh who do you love, poor Angus,When Catherine's left the moor?"Ah, then, sir, then's the only timeI feel I'm really poor.”

“I know a way to stay friends forever, There's really nothing to it, I tell you what to do, And you do it.”

“Now I lay me down to sleep,I pray the Lord my soul to keep,And if I die before I wake,I pray the Lord my toys will break.So none of the other kids can use 'em....Amen.”

“Standing is stupid, Crawling's a curse, Skipping is silly,Walking is worse.Hopping is hopeless,Jumping's a chore,Sitting is senseless, Leaning's a bore.Running's ridiculous,Jogging's insane-Guess I'll go upstairs andLie down again.”

“If you have to dry the dishes (Such an awful boring chore)If you have to dry the dishes('Stead of going to the store)If you have to dry the dishesAnd you drop one on the floorMaybe they won't let youDry the dishes anymore”

“My beard grows down to my toes,I never wears no clothes,I wraps my hairAround my bare,And down the road I goes.”

“And the tree was happy”

“To me, freedom entitles you to do something, not to not do something.”

“When I was younger, I wasn't making it, and I was mad at everybody who was.”

“This boat that we just built is just fine - And don't try to tell us it's not The sides and the back are divine - It's the bottom I guess we forgot”

“Just Me, Just MeSweet Marie, she loves just me(She also loves Maurice McGhee).No she don't, she loves just me(She also loves Louise Dupree).No she don't, she loves just me(She also loves the willow tree).No she don't, she loves just me!(Poor, poor fool, why can't you seeShe can love others and still love thee.)”

“You'd better get your laugh while you're making your point, or you won't be doing it very long.”

“The child asks, 'Why don't I have this happiness thing you're telling me about?'”

“I can be somebody's and still be my own.”

“Knock! knock!who's there?me!me who?that's right?what's right?meehoo!that's what I want to know!what's what you want to know?me who?yes, exactly!exactly what?yes, I have exactlywatt on a chain!exactly what on a chain?yes!yes what?no, exactlywatt!that's what I want to know!I told you-exactlywatt!exactly what?yes!yes what?yes it's with me.what's with you?exactlywatt-that's what with me.me who?yes!go away!knock knock...”