Shaquille O'Neal

“I want to be strong, dominant. Like Wilt Chamberlain.”

“I had an awful first quarter but I picked it up. To all you single guys out there, it's not how you start the date, it's how you finish it sir. A lot of people can, you know, start the date with flowers and candy, but if you don't finish the date - you know what I mean?”

“Why don't you bring your face up here and let me punch it? Then you can tell me (if I'm stronger).”

“Someday I might have to put down a basketball and have a regular 9-to-5 like everybody else.”

“I play against a front and a back every night, Ming does not have to do that, Duncan does not have to do that, Garnett doesn't do that. I am the only one that has to do that.”

“Me shooting 40% at the foul line is just God's way to say nobody's perfect.”

“Nobody's going to tell me how to be different, so stop asking me. Stop asking me what two-plus-two is. Everybody knows two-plus-two is five.”

“I started out as a young Ninja and killed all of the Shoguns. I am a Shogun now and I'm holding my spot. There probably won't be another Shogun after this.”

“I've been playing on Christmas for the last 10, 11, 12 years. So just got to get up early with the babies, and give them their toys and try to get a nap in and just come to play.”

“I just want to keep people entertained.”

“And I want to do it the right way, like everybody else, not just a famous figurehead that gets a job because he is a famous basketball player. I want to really learn the business.”

“I'm a weird big guy. Doing rapping, doing movies. Do a lot of stuff. But always do things the right way.”

“Our offense is like the pythagorean theorem: There is no answer!”

“Whenever I see a celebrity that comes to watch me play, I'm going to do for them the same thing they've done for me - bring them some type of joy.”

“My job has always been to entertain people. I want people to laugh.”

“When you're in championships, it's never about what you do. It's always about what other people do.”

“Challenge me. Treat me like a game of checkers and play me. That's all I'm asking, just play me. Treat me like Sega and play me.”

“I'm on a mission. And I know the older I get, I may lose a step or two, but it's all up in the medulla oblongata. I've got a lot up there. I've got a lot of knowledge... in this medulla oblongata.”

“We're just going to come out and play. We know that we're supposed to win all the games, but if we don't, we just have to take the next game and focus on what we did wrong in the game before and just try to do better at the next game.”

“I would like to be refered to as 'The Big Aristotle'.”