Mark Russell

“I do jokes about what's funny, and both sides are funny.”

“Believe me when I say that Bill Clinton's second term will be good for business. My business.”

“I'll keep doing it until I die or the audiences die.”

“You've got the brain-washed, that's the Democrats, and the brain-dead, that's the Republicans!”

“Of course, with any new technology, the question in the back of everyone's mind is 'Can I have sex with it or use it to kill people?'-Flintstones Vol. 2: Bedrock Bedlam”

“The thing that you're faulted on today is not that you are too tough, or not that you aren't careful. It's that you might have been too soft. People want that red meat now because you have to keep up with the mood and the mood today is harsh. It really is.”

“I try not to speak to critics. It only encourages them.-Snagglepuss”

“Humor is very very risky, particularly for a candidate, unless he's been in so long that it just doesn't matter, and he's not running for president. But it's just that people are so sensitive and so touchy, and you're just going to upset somebody without ever realizing it.”

“You know that a given in life in human nature, is that at a sporting event, a baseball game, a football game, you never introduce a politician, is because he'll be booed. I don't care if he's the most beloved person in the world, its part of the game.”

“We're just moving along as quick as possible.”

“If the audience doesn't like it, usually they're just silent. But they've never all walked out at once.”

“You know when Jerry Ford gets the best joke, you know you're in trouble.”

“I believe that Bill Clinton's second term will be good for business... my business!”

“The world is on fire, young man. As writers, it is only proper that we do what we can to warn people.But in telling the truth to the world, don't lie to yourself. Write whatever you want. Tell the truth. Just don't imagine that you are changing anything.Like I said, people just want to have a good time. -Snagglepuss”

“The scientific theory I like best is that the rings of Saturn are composed entirely of lost airline luggage.”

“People are not in a good mood when any politician's face appears on television.”

“Son, in life you do not fight battles because you expect to win......you fight them merely because they need to be fought.-Snagglepuss”

“If you call your opponent a politician, it's grounds for libel.”

“I can't think of a performer who is better on television than in person.”

“Rush has done some top-notch quality work, and we're very, very pleased with them. We really enjoy working with them. They are on time and on budget, which makes me happy.”