Mario Cantone

“I'm crass, contemptuous and crude, obstreperous, obnoxious, rambunctiously raw and rude.”

“I mean, the things you think will never happen, you have to confront; those things that come into your life that you thought you never could deal with, you do.”

“I love doing scripted things. What little acting ability I have I am holding on with my hangnails.”

“I knew the full 'Judy Garland Carnegie Hall' double album set at age 2. And then my mother wondered why I was gay. I was like, 'Are you nuts? You would make me get on the table to sing Judy Garland songs and you're upset?'”

“I like to hold a book. When someone sends me a script, I ask for a hard copy or print one out.”

“I wouldn't live with me, believe me. I'm moody.”

“I know, it's weird that I've never done a musical. I turned down two of them. 'The Lion King' and 'The Producers.' I turned two of the biggest Broadway musicals down, am I a mess?”

“Our black president can't say that he's for gay marriage. That is upsetting to me.”

“Stand-up was like being on a Barbie townhouse stage.”

“I won't do reality. That is done. And I don't want people following me around with a camera 24 hours a day.”

“Who do you think I am, Pete Rose? I don't bet. I come from a long line of compulsive gamblers. Gambling scares me.”

“I love animation, I really do, but I don't do it for the children.”

“Look, you're either loved or hated. Which is a good thing, as Bette Davis used to say.”

“In the '70s, the gay movement was really making strides. Huge strides. And then AIDS came along and slapped a judgment on it all and the Right Wing religious movement was like, 'See. This is why, we told you.' And it pushed back the movement 30 years.”

“I hated high school. Ugh. I couldn't wait until it was over so I could sleep in. In college, I made sure all my classes were in the afternoon. I hated getting up in the morning.”