Joe Piscopo

“I worked in Trenton, and then I got sidetracked into comedy and then onto 'SNL.' And then into being a live performer - what I do now; virtually that's what I am: I'm a live entertainer.”

“I'm a dedicated father - a hopeless, dedicated father. I mean, I am dork dad. I am just - I love my children. I have kids - you know, Joey's 30-something, and then I have all the way down to 4 years old, believe it or not. At my age, five kids.”

“I graduated from Jones College, man, in Jacksonville, Florida, baby! I couldn't get in anywhere else, man. I was the worst student ever. I couldn't get in anywhere else. My father insisted I go to college, so I graduated, made the dean's list and everything.”

“I'll tell ya this: I come from an educated family. My father was an attorney representing blue collar workers, and my uncle was a chemical engineer... on my mom's side, all my uncles were engineers - all ten of them.”

“I starred in Dr. Pepper commercials and Buick ads.”

“All I ever wanted to do was bit parts on Broadway. I have more than achieved any goal that I aspired to.”

“If I disagree with someone, I let them have their say and move on. I don't want to be the one to lecture.”

“I am that 'everyman' in that I have made every mistake you can make in your career and in your personal life. But I am a survivor.”

“I stay in Jersey - it's home, man. It's home. And I think that's the foundation of the true strength of the communities where we live in America.”

“If I had the gift of Jerry Seinfeld, of Bill Cosby, of Lewis Black, these instinctively brilliant comic minds, then you go that route! But you gotta know your limitations. I'm more of an actor, more of a process guy. I did Tom Snyder, just as Danny Aykroyd did on 'SNL.' I did it in the club.”