Harry Enfield

“The history of post-war Britain shows us that we are lousy at running our economy. We need someone to do it for us.”

“I've never felt cutting-edge. Maybe Loadsamoney was for a few months, but after that I've just done family stuff.”

“Men seem to relate to boys better, sharing their interests in whizzing about and football and car-cars and other moronic activities.”

“I'm good at caricature.”

“I have a dear friend called Kate St John who is a musical genius.”

“I've been deeply involved in writing garbage since I was 16.”

“Like most lapsed Catholics, I will probably return to the fold when I start to fear death.”

“I don't mind what the critics say, but I don't generally read them. I'm more concerned with viewing figures.”

“At the end of every series, I think I won't do any more. But as long as I can think of fresh stuff, I can keep going.”

“In private companies that are successful, the management have learnt to put their staff first, customers second, shareholders last.”

“Everyone's come up against a snob or a know-all.”

“As I get older and skinnier people recognise me much less.”

“Someone said that the good thing about my TV programme was that it had so many tics, which I think are the subtle little touches of originality that Paul brings to it.”

“When I was on 'Top Gear' they thought it was funny I used to have a Vauxhall Cavalier convertible.”

“If people like you, and you disappoint them, they get very hurt by it.”

“I tend to think that these white supremacists like Terreblanche, the boneheads of the BNP and Bernard Manning are all so revoltingly ugly and unpleasant that they make the best possible advertisement for mixed marriages. Would you prefer your daughter to look like Naomi Campbell or Bernard Manning?”

“I've had dinner with two Beatles and a Rolling Stone;I've said 'hello' to Whitney Houston and shared a cab with Larry Adler.”

“I've got three very expensive kids and I had to buy a house in Notting Hill.”

“Why is everyone so obsessed with attracting the young? The Telegraph, Radio 4 - everyone wants a younger audience when everyone knows the population is getting older and older, and that older people have more dosh than young people.”

“When I was 15 my great Aunt Nancy gave me a book of Alan Bennett plays, and I thought he was the bees knees.”