Harry Anderson

“There's this perception sometimes around here that I'm this Hollywood guy.”

“It's an old Elizabethan idea. The fool is the only one who is allowed to make fun of the king because he is a fool. I can say whatever I want about anybody else because I'm just an idiot talking - I'm not insisting that I'm any smarter than anyone else. It's satire.”

“I'm not Hollywood. I'm a Quarter Rat. I belong here.”

“Everyone's life would be improved if they do could one great magic trick. And tell one great joke, play one tune on the piano, and do one great origami fold.”

“Even a fool knows you can't touch the stars, but it won't keep the wise from trying.”

“I did a film called 'The Escape Artist' for Francis Coppola. I had the title role.”

“But I'm very thankful that no one is slamming my head against the wall anymore.”

“I've always done magic as a hobby. I've done it professionally, too.”

“The biggest challenge in New Orleans has been to find workers who can climb a ladder after lunch.”

“There is no magic. There are only magicians.”

“I'll give it a shot. But I don't know that a year from now I'm going to be here. Nobody does.”

“I don't know how long anything is going to last, so I have to make sure I have something to do tomorrow.”

“Is now the time to legalize prostitution?”

“If you do sleight of hand without trying to cheat someone, that's what magic is.”

“In 'Night Court,' my name is still Harry, and I'm - my best friends are still three-card monte workers, and I still have spring snakes hidden everywhere and joy buzzers, but I'm the judge.”

“Somebody saw me on 'Cheers' and thought that I was an actor playing a part as opposed to a guy just doing what he knew. And they gave me 'Night Court.' And by the time they realized I wasn't an actor, I had already signed a five-year contract.”

“Chicago is a big town for magicians and card hustlers. So when I was very young, a fellow sat me down and taught me the Three-Card Monte. And that kind of put me in a - pointed me towards easy money.”

“We treated all of the dead with dignity.”

“I did rough hustling, what they call 'playing against the wall.' I just played myself with the players, so I would pay; I would make them shill. I would pay certain players and then take from others.”

“I am richer than Davy Crockett. I can settle back and do what I want to do. And what I want to do is card tricks and magic.”