George Bernard Shaw

“When our relatives are at home, we have to think of all their good points or it would be impossible to endure them. But when they are away, we console ourselves for their absence by dwelling on their vices.”

“No question is so difficult to answer as that to which the answer is obvious.”

“Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive.”

“My method is to take the utmost trouble to find the right thing to say, and then to say it with the utmost levity.”

“Make it a rule never to give a child a book you would not read yourself.”

“Cruelty would be delicious if one could only find some sort of cruelty that didn't really hurt.”

“Creation is a miracle of daily recurrence. 'A miracle a minute' would not be a bad slogan for God.”

“All genuinely intellectual work is humorous.”

“You can always tell an old soldier by the inside of his holsters and cartridge boxes. The young ones carry pistols and cartridges; the old ones, grub.”

“A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.”

“Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.”

“Nothing but the natural ignorance of the public, countenanced by the inoculated erroneousness of the ordinary general medical practitioners, makes such a barbarism as vaccination possible.......Recent developments have shown that an inoculation made in the usual general practitioner's light-hearted way, without previous highly skilled examination of the state of the patient's blood, is just as likely to be a simple manslaughter as a cure or preventive. But vaccination is nothing short of attempted murder. A skilled bacteriologist would just as soon think of cutting his child's arm and rubbing the contents of the dustpan into the wound, as vaccinating it in the same.”

“A pessimist is a man who thinks everybody is as nasty as himself, and hates them for it.”

“Do you think that the things people make fools of themselves about are any less real and true than the things they behave sensibly about? They are more true: they are the only things that are true.”

“The idea of personal salvation is intensely repugnant to me when it is not absurd. Imagine Roosevelt, the big brute, preserving his personality in a future state and swaggering about as a celestial Rough Rider!”

“Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”

“An election is a moral horror, as bad as a battle except for the blood; a mud bath for every soul concerned in it.”

“The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me.”

“You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul.”

“It's easier to replace a dead man than a good picture.”