Dave Chappelle

“The only thing harder than leaving show business is coming back.”

“I've been a comedian since I was fourteen. But I've never really been a CEO.”

“People don't know what it's like standing up there onstage, when you have a wall of people smiling at you.”

“My father told me 'Name your price in the beginning. If it ever gets more expensive than the price you name, get out of there.'”

“Stand-up is the kind of gig that'll show you where you're at.”

“I love my jokes.”

“You know you must be doing something right if old people like you.”

“America, I appreciate you liking me.”

“After a while, a joke, if you say it too much, just becomes contrived, or fake-sounding.”

“If I put forth a legitimate effort, then I feel like, if that doesn't work out, that's all I can do.”

“הייתה פעם זונה שעשתה ניתוח פלסטי להשתלת איבר מין במותן שלה. למה? היא רצתה לרוויח קצת כסף מהצד.”

“אני עשיר! כלבה!”

“כלבות!, בוא ותקיימו סקס עם צ'ארלי מרפי!, אני ריק ג'יימס, כלבה!!”

“אני ריק ג'יימס, כלבה!!”

“קוקאין זה אחלה סם.”

“מממ... סנדביץ' של חמאת בוטנים וקראק!!”

“רד-בולס (אשכים אדומים) - זה נותן לי כנפיים!”

“אני חושב שכל חבורה של שחורים צריכה לפחות לבן אחד - שיהיה מישהו לדבר עם המשטרה.”

“You got to be careful of the company you keep.”

“Being famous is great, it's not like bad or horrible or anything.”