Arthur Baer

“The ladies looked one another over with microscopic carelessness.”

“Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse.”

“If you do big things they print your face, and if you do little things they print only your thumbs.”

“If you laid all our laws end to end, there would be no end.”

“Lefty Grove could throw a lamb chop past a wolf.”

“His head was full of larceny, but his feet were honest.”

“She's generous to a fault - if it's her own.”

“It was as helpful as throwing a drowning man both ends of the rope.”

“It is impossible to tell where the law stops and justice begins.”

“It was so quiet, you could hear a pun drop.”

“His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours.”

“She used to diet on any kind of food she could lay her hands on.”

“A newspaper is a circulating library with high blood pressure.”

“A good neighbor is a fellow who smiles at you over the back fence, but doesn't climb over it.”

“A plumber is an adventurer who traces leaky pipes to their source.”