Alanea Alder

“Shower sex sucks," Meryn announced loudly.Elizabeth leaned forward dying to know what prompted that statement. "What happened?""Slippery surfaces and not the good kind, one." Meryn started ticking off reasons on her fingers. "Water not a natural lubricant, two. Height differences, three. And I got a freaking charley horse right when..." Aiden covered her mouth at that point.Ahh. So someone had fun and someone didn't. Poor Meryn.”

“Oh God, is this like Silence of the Lambs?" Tears flowed down her face. "I don't want to go down the hole! I won't put lotion on the skin! Look at me, you won't be able to wear my skin, I won't cover your huge ass!" She wailed.”

“Can I ride you next time? You can be my battle cat! That would be so cool!”

“Don't blink. Don't even blink." she whispered."What in the hell are you talking about?" Aiden looked around trying to identify a hidden threat."You blink and you're dead." Meryn stared at the two large stone angels on either side of a heavy looking wooden door unblinking. Aiden's hand went to his sidearm."Meryn, that is just a statue.""But what if it isn't? I mean up until this week I didn't think paranormals existed and now you're all over the fucking place. I can't take the chance.”

“They are my baby Keelans!”

“She needs tampons. Evidently it helps with this process. We have to secure the location of where they are being sold, acquire them and then get them back to my mate posthaste.”

“Do you always drink from a glass?" she finally exploded. Gavriel shook his head. "Over my lifetime, I have fed in nearly every way imaginable. Drinking from a glass is tame is comparison." Meryn started to grin. "Would you drink from a man?" Gavriel nodded. "Would you drink in a van?" she asked, her eyes dancing. "I don't see why not," he replied. Elizabeth stared as Meryn continued. "Would you drink from an actor?" Again, Gavriel nodded. Laughing, Elizabeth shook her head at Meryn. "Would you drink on a tractor?" Meryn could barely get the words out she was laughing so hard. Gavriel frowned. "Maybe from a farmer if the need were dire.”

“You can't adopt people like kittens! Aiden growled. 'I wouldn't know; someone wouldn't let me get a kitten', Meryn retorted. 'Fine, you can have a kitten, no people''Too late”

“I enjoy my crazy, thank you very much. I noticed a long time ago that those who value normalcy to the point of making someone else feel like shit for being different were assholes. I stopped caring about what people thought of me after that.”

“Hello little one. Did you know you're on private property?""Really? I had no idea." Meryn fudged. He raised an eyebrow. "The ten foot fence right behind you didn't give it away?”

“I've been wearing my super gown because someone won't let me go get maternity clothes because they are being a paranoid, drama bear”

“you don't have the luxury of whipping out your dicks and seeing who's bigger”

“Aleks opened his mouth to reassure his friend when he heard something that chilled him to the bone.“Aleksander Aaron Arkadion! What in the hell is wrong with you! Why are you dragging that mangled corpse through town? You traumatized an entire first-grade class on a field trip to the town center,” Ma said, striding up to them pointing down to the body that Aleks still had a hold of.He looked down at the ankle he was holding.“Fuck my life.” Aleks looked behind his ma at the trail of blood heading back to the ice cream parlor.Liam laughed, his arms wrapped around his waist holding his sides.”

“Get your fang boner under control. Your freaking out my person”

“This first time , my Sprite friend went for help, then Aiden went all shifter Hulk version and Loki'd the feral's ass. Whap, whap”

“How do you poop? Where does it go? If you get more prestigious as you go down, aren't you shitting on the upper classes?”