Abe Lemons

“Damn referees, I'll miss them less than anybody.”

“Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.”

“One day of practice is like one day of clean living. It doesn't do you any good.”

“It was a hole in one contest and I had a three.”

“I don't have any tricky plays, I'd rather have tricky players.”

“There are really only two plays: Romeo and Juliet, and put the darn ball in the basket.”

“The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.”

“I don't jog, if I die I want to be sick.”

“You know what they call the fellow who finishes last in his medical school graduating class? They call him 'Doctor.'”